The Dirty Wife
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A wife decides that she needs to spice up her and her husband's sex life. So, she goes to the adult novelty store and came back with some crotchless panties.
She goes home, puts them on and waits for her husband to come home. When he does, she lifts up her dress and shows him her new panties, asking, "You want some of this?"
"Hell no," says the husband, "look what it did to your underwear!"