Bird-Brained in Helopisa
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John went on vacation to Helopisa. As soon as he stepped outside, SPLAT!!! A big piece of bird shit fell on him. He asked the first person he saw where he could wash it off.
'No! No!,' they said. 'You cannot wash it off! That is good luck! The ancient foo bird has chosen you! You must never wash it off!'
'Hey, I can live with good luck!' he thought.
But after a while, it started to stink. Every time that he was about to wash it off, someone appeared and said ' No! You cannot wash it off.' So he left it on. After a week, people on the street started avoiding him. No one would give him the time of day anymore. So as soon as he got back to the hotel, he washed it off. At dinner time, he got dressed and left the hotel. At the first intersection he came to, he got hit and killed by a Mack truck. All because he washed off the bird shit.
The moral of this story is, 'If the foo shits, wear it!'