Skin Canoes
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Three men are found in the wilderness by civilized cannibals. The men are led to a gravesite next to the water.
"You have two choices of death," says the chief. "We either will kill you as a coward, or we will let you die honarable deaths for your homelands. You choose the weapon. Either way, your skins will be used to make our canoes."
The first man, a soldier at heart, asks for a handgun. With this shoots himself. The next man, a warrior at heart, he uses a Japanese katana to commit seppuku as a Japanese man. The last man asks for a fork. He stabs himself repeatedly in the chest.
"I HOPE YOUR CANOE SINKS!"